Audrey Hepburn doesn’t suit everyone

So I was watching this TV show yesterday (while still half dead because of that cold. Back in business today, no more vampire show re-runs ) and the two teams had to get a day and an evening outfit in Audrey Hepburn style in a set budget. I think it was like 200 euro…
And the judges were complimenting the outfits and such (bring back Simon Cowel you fools!!) But to me the whole thing was hideous. The model looked crude and too unpolished for the whole thing. Audrey Hepburn worked for her-the petite brunette with cute features so she could look sweet and charming even in the cold and heartless monochrome. But if you’re tall and you walk like a catwalk model, except your stride is bigger, don’t go anywhere near Audrey Hepburn look. Or actually, do, in the changing rooms, with a friend so she could advise you. Because if it’s not you it won’t matter if it’s the style of a greatest style icon in history – it won’t fit you right. You’ll just look like some weirdo wannabe and that’s NOT hot. So unless you want to get kicked out of Tinaffany’s for fashion crimes against humanity, don’t go with something because some magazine told you it was the latest IT item. Pick something that suits you. And don’t discard any Audrey Hepburn pieces because I told you so (even if I didn’t) if you look fabulous in them. Buy a mirror, and be sure you wear what you want, how you want, and that you look damn good in it.

Have a good day, I know I will.

By the way, I saw Gossip Girl last night. The one with the Snowflake ball? If I was Vanessa I would have flaunted that body and shouted: You like what you see? And walke with my head held high, instead of running away crying. It’s all about the attitude.

You know no one cares…

…when after asking: “Did you catch a cold?”
You get a marvellous answer of: “Bacon, sausage and egg.”
he didn’t even bother with please or tried to hide that smirk off his face that showed he was assuming I’m an illiterate immigrant and an utter idiot.
For the record, illiterate idiots don’t get the scores I do when it comes to any exams.

So what makes us block people out?
Really.

Is it that no one really cares what others have to say, or it is because they feel like strangers shouldn’t interrupt their all-important train of thought. Or maybe it’s because I’m a woman and statistically, we can’t keep a secret for more than 47 hours. I mean who will want to speak to someone who’s so untrustworthy.

But we all have our reasons to shut others out, be all modern, and cosmopolitan and pretend no one else exists.
So is ignoring people’s presence a new form of self defence? We’ve been told that mental blows are a lot tougher on people for years now, maybe, finally it sank through?

I’m probably the only girl that would be in stitches laughing if it happened to me.
Or would you too?

Lectures kick-off tomorrow.
And I’m going bungee jumping.

Today’s stats:
4 hours of sleep
5 cups of super strong coffee
1 almost-mutilated thumb.
1 proximate traffic collision
2.5 miles (running) at less than 20 minutes. Is that slow?

Beatles are making a comeback – because We’re broke

So while the chicken is simmering, I’ll clue you in on the latest craze: The Beatles. Forget Jackson and tight-high boots. It’s all about the old British boys and some good Brit-pop. ‘HMV’ and ‘Game Stop’ are flooded with ‘Rockstar’ versions of the Beatles band. Charts are topped not by Beyonce or even the deceased Michael Jackson. Nope. According to the latest research (carried out 13th September, around 6 PM if you’re being accurate) it’s the Beatles. And not just one CD either. Noo… The top three places in the most bought charts are all occupied by the Beatles. Then you have Michael and Beyonce, and the likes of ‘BandSlam Soundtrack’ and Muse. So what is it that drew everyone to buy the Beatles all over again? Believe it or not, it’s the crisis. Simple as that, hippies are re-born because they’re cheap. And they listen to Beatles. Then again, everyone else listens to Beatles too. Just because Beatles make you happy.

Now however, I’ll go listen to some Def Lepard and finish making that dinner.
But you really should get some Beatles happiness.

Global Responsibility – People, not just the Carbon Emissions

There are certain people in our lives that bring out the best of us. Sometimes, it’s a spouse that encourages your talent. Sometimes it’s a friend that convinces you that despite everything, you are good enough, and you do have a lot to be confident about. For me, it’s a lot more simple, or maybe on the contrary, helluva lot more complicated than those everyday examples.

In my early to mid-teens I was a bit of a hell raiser. My parents still don’t know more than half of the things I did, especially during the long summers. You had anything from trespassing, exploring derelict or just abandoned buildings and dancing in the middle of a road to screaming and waving at trucks from a bridge over a highway to get them to honk, to throwing someone’s shoes on top of trucks passing by or drinking under the said bridge. Dirty dancing in bus stops was of course on the agenda and that’s just a few things I’m not too embarrassed to mention in order to get my point across. I didn’t care if I acted inappropriately. But more important is the fact that back then, I didn’t care too much about hurting people, emotionally and, if I was very infuriated, even physically. Deep down, yes I cared, or at least I stink I did, things can be hard to remember from those days. And not because I was heavily intoxicated. To this day actually I have never been properly drunk. Tipsy? Yes. drunk? Never. So as you may see I had some small limits. But that teenage girl is not all that similar to the young woman I am now.
I mean yesterday, my friend caught me trying to surprise people on my own birthday party that I’m planning. And he also pin pointed the source of my ridiculous habit of pleasing people and trying to do something for others – my best friend. I feel like names shouldn’t be mentioned.
And I realised he was right. From the time my family and I moved, I changed a lot. And I’m not talking about any of the usual changes people go through during their teens. No, I developed a very strong conscience, stone hard morals, that I do bend sometimes on a night out when spur of the moment makes me do something that in my right mind, I wouldn’t. But don’t we all? And also, this compulsion to do good for others, no matter what it costs me (again, I’m not talking the monetary stakes here).

So my point (yes there is one) is what people can do for one another. How we all affect each other in a multitude of ways, all very much important to the development of people around us. We don’t just influence global warming and pollution levels, we help build the personalities of those around us and in turn, we are responsible for a lot more than just ourselves. Taking that into consideration, we really should stop acting like it’s all about us, and that it’s nobody’s business how we treat ourself and how we respond to other people around us. Because it is. Your grumpiness to someone who is depressed can drive them to suicide. Have you ever thought about that when you shunned some poor fellow away, because you didn’t feel like explaining yourself to him/her? Have you ever thought about how those charity collectors feel when no one looks them in the face, even though they’re working for a good cause? Is it that damn hard to smile and say: ‘no, thanks’?!! No, but that person who was standing in the rain for the last 5 hours to collect money for a children’s hospital, will really appreciate you acting like a human being that you’re supposed to be and not some urban robot we’re all turning to recently.
So when Christmas comes around and the streets are packed with school students in Santa hats with plenty good will and intentions, even if you don’t have change to spare, do acknowledge their existence – they’re not out there to rob you.

And today, be nice to someone besides yourself. Smile at strangers. Talk about the weather with a lonely gran that practically lives at your local coffee house and doesn’t have anyone to talk to. It’s going to be as nice for you as it is for them.
And if you’re an over achiever, start training for a charity marathon. I’m right behind you on that one.

Beauty: Worth taking it too far?

I was looking over “Stellar”, Irish fashion magazine enduring my 2 hour hair mask (yes, ENDURING, not by any means enjoying the experience, you’ll see latter why, I’m enclosing the recipe of my home-made mask at the end of this post) when my thoughts started buzzing. How far women go to be considered beautiful, to be desired by the opposite sex and envied by fellow women? The smell of my face mask was saying enough. We take it too far. But sometimes, we don’t have a choice. Yet, often we succumb to fashions and expectations at great costs, and I’m not talking about your valet size here either.

Look at Elizabethan times: women whitened their faces with ceruse – a mixture of white lead and vinegar – every day, a mixture which was highly poisonous (yeah, they had to have been nuts, but have you ever read the ingredients on your foundation? I bet if you looked up all those fancy words, you wouldn’t touch that thing ever again!). Sometimes, to achieve the desired pale complexion women were bled! Of course they didn’t know about the deadly powers of their make-up bags, but if they had known their daily beauty routine would send them into an early grave, would they given it up? Somehow I doubt it.

Some 21st century examples would possibly include shaving, every day, which in turn produces more hair and leaves us caught up in a closed circle. But that’s just the top of the iceberg.
Don’t you forget designer clothes, shoes and accessories. There is this misconception out and about that you HAVE to have something by Miu Miu, Viviene Westwood, Chanel, Dolce Gabanna, Prada, Marc Jacobs, Juicy Couture or Yves Saint Loren ETC, to be a whole woman.
So if you don’t spend 150 Euro (a little over 215 dollars) on a Miu Miu keyring which should be bought if you ‘can’t stretch it to the price of the bag’ (Direct quote from “Stellar”) you, according to the latest standards should be unhappy, depressed and socially retarded. Now in your right mind, do you actually think it’s true? Because if so, you’re in a big need of a long and comfy stay at the ‘Blonde to Your Last Brain Cell Rehab Centre’. I heard they implant brains over there.
Girls who diet themselves to near death should be sent to the same place, and also assigned a good shrink, that’s all I’m saying on the issue, because I think we all heard far too much about the size zero disease at this stage.

But believe it or not, some ridiculous means are justified. Mine is as well. Or at least that’s what I’m telling myself to make me feel better about my first ever beauty sacrifice. The all natural face mask I had on for two hours is based on the product my gran used to get her hair back after having chemo treatment. And believe it or not, it worked! A lot better than anyone expected.
Castor oil is used in pharmaceuticals, food and other industries. It helps boost your hair growth for that va voom look. My excuse for using it will remain under wraps, but although curly hair hides a multitude of sins, it doesn’t make them disappear…

So the magical, yet slightly disgusting hair mask:
1 egg yolk
1 table spoon of caster oil
1 table spoon of olive oil
0.5 table spoon of onion juice (grate the onion and sieve that mush)
1 table spoon of freshly squeezed lemon juice.

Beat everything into an even, liquid mixture using a fork.

Rub thoroughly into towel-wet hair, get some sort of comb to keep all hair on top of your head in a bunch if your hair is long, tie a plastic bag around your head (beware ladies: the bag is supposed to cover just the hair area to keep it from drying, if you want to commit suicide be merciful on yourself and leave out the smelly onion…) and wrap in a towel. Leave to soak for anything between an hour and two hours.
Be prepared to wash your hair about 3 times using a handful of ‘Head&Shoulders’ each time, and putting in conditioner that smells nicely twice (I recommend ‘Pantene’) to get rid of the after smell(it did the trick for me). Also if you have any body mist use it after getting out of the shower. It’ll make you feel helluva lot better about the whole ordeal.
Only recommended to use if you are suffering from hair loss, or severely weakened hair, use once a week, twice if you’re brave.

Do you think this is taking it too far?
It’s your call, but I would love to hear some quirky beauty tips that really work.